If it takes a lifetime

Child of my heart,
Before I knew you,
someone held your hand
Before I knew you,
someone made you smile
Before I knew you,
someone gave you love
Before I knew you,
someone answered your call
Before I knew you,
someone taught you songs
Before I knew you,
someone taught you dance
Before I knew you,
someone comforted your cries

nine months before I knew you
someone gave you life
someone carried you
someone nurtured you
someone worried for you
someone nourished you
someone dreamed of you
someone gave you a chance

I know this someone is very special to you. I don't ever want to take this person away from your heart. This person is responsible for you being here today and I will always be grateful. I will try to remember this when I see your anger and I feel your pain. I will try to hold this love in my heart that I feel for you every moment until you are ready for it to be yours. I hope that when you need me the most I can be patient, and kind. I hope to be the mother that you deserve. I know it seems we've taken you from this life that was just right. You had it all - a mom, a dad, a sister and maybe even a brother. You have come into our lives and adapted to our strange ways very quickly. You've learned to eat our strange foods, to sleep in our strange beds, to speak our strange language, to smell our strange smells. You have mastered them and made each your own. You are a very strong and brave little girl with a sweet disposition and a loving heart. You make the world around you a happier place to be.

So many changes have come your way in such a short time of just 7 months.

Your birth mother carried you for 9

Your foster mother nurtured you for 9

It is an honor for me to love you and give everything I have to give. I have dreamed of you my entire life and now that you are real, I am overwhelmed. I'm sorry if I get frustrated at times when it seems that we don't see things eye to eye. I know you are missing those things that brought you comfort, although I don't know what they are. I wish I knew what you think at those moments when you are so frustrated and can't tell me your needs. Looking into your soft face while you dream, I can only imagine what your thoughts must be. When you search my eyes upon waking and cry for me to hold you I wonder who you are really looking to find. Will it ever be me that you look for? I can/will/do promise to love you forever and give you all the time you need to adapt to me being your new Mom. I know it will take some time. All my life is yours now and you can trust in me to never go away.

Love You Baby!

Yours Forever,
Mommy